Why Homebuyer Letters May Backfire
Some home sellers may be turned off by personal letters from buyers. Experts say there are better ways to make your offer stand out in a competitive market.
NEW YORK — If you have bought a house (or tried to) in the last few years, you know how competitive the housing market can be. With the spring real estate market picking up in many parts of the country, prospective homebuyers may again be on the threshold of a fierce buying process, pushing them to consider any path to get a leg up on an offer.
That may include writing a letter to the sellers, detailing how much you love the property and could envision a life there. These so-called love letters, however, may not be the best approach to making your offer more enticing.
Do love letters work?
The effectiveness of the love letters can vary based on the seller, Charlie Lankston, executive editor for Realtor.com, told Nexstar via email. A seller with a deeper personal connection to the property may be "more inclined to pick a buyer who is showing a real personal connection to the property, and who has gone above and beyond in order to make clear their vision for its future."
Alternatively, some may view selling their home simply as a transaction and "be put off by the more personal approach."
A spring 2021 survey of Zillow Premier Agent partners ranked love letters among the least effective strategies used in transactions among buyers' and listing agents.
It's best to consult with your real estate agent to determine whether or not penning a letter is helpful for your offer, Lankston said.
How to write a love letter
If you would prefer to write a love letter to accompany your offer, Lankston recommends emphasizing what you love about the home and avoiding mentioning renovations or changes you would like to make upon moving in.
"A little praise goes a long way in these situations – and it doesn't hurt to pick out a few very specific design touches or features that you loved in particular when viewing the home," Lankston explained.
You may want to opt against sharing characteristics that may open the door to bias, according to Zillow. That could include details about your family or children, how your family plans to enjoy the home, what you do for work or information about your place of worship.
Legal concerns surrounding love letters
Amid scrutiny that the letters could lead to sellers discriminating against buyers, the National Association of Realtors® warned in 2020 that the seemingly innocuous tactic could "pose fair housing risks." The organization noted that buyers may include information that reveals "characteristics" of themselves, like their race, religion or familial status, "which could then be used, knowingly or through unconscious bias, as an unlawful basis for a seller's decision to accept or reject an offer."
Oregon became the first state in the nation to enact a ban on love letters in real estate transactions. The law prohibited Realtors® from passing along letters that could potentially be discriminatory to homeowners; prospective buyers would need to deliver the letter to the seller themselves, the Portland Tribune explained. Oregon's attorney general later conceded that the ban was unconstitutional shortly after it took effect in January 2022.
Real estate lawyers did, however, tell The New York Times in 2021 that proving or prosecuting discrimination connected to a love letter would be extremely difficult, if not impossible.
Alternatives for competitive offers
If penning a letter isn't your forte, you can still craft an attractive offer. A cash offer is, of course, among the most effective ways to make your offer stand out, Lankston said.
Speaking of finances, you'll want to make sure yours are in order, even without a cash offer. Lankston recommends having a pre-approval letter on hand, a strong credit score, and other financial documents prepared. And, if you're taking out a mortgage, you may want to consider putting down more than the typical 20%, Lankston said.
The seller may even tell you what would sweeten the deal for them. A report by Zillow, citing a spring 2021 survey, showed that many sellers may prefer – and even need – a lease-back agreement that allows them to stay in the home beyond closing while they close on their future home. There may be other concessions as well, like a further-out closing date.
In April, the median price of a home listed for sale rose only 0.3% from a year earlier, according to Realtor.com. Buyers who can afford current mortgage rates have a wider selection of properties now than a year ago.
Active listings – a tally that encompasses all homes on the market except those pending a finalized sale – surged 30.6% last month from a year earlier, according to Realtor.com. Home listings jumped between 67.6% and 70.1% in San Diego, San Jose, and Washington, D.C.
As properties take longer to sell, more sellers are reducing their asking price. Some 18% of listings had their price reduced last month, according to Realtor.com.
"Sellers are becoming more flexible on pricing, underscored by the price reductions we're seeing, and while higher mortgage rates are certainly weighing on demand, the silver lining is that the market is starting to rebalance," said Danielle Hale, chief economist at Realtor.com. "This could create opportunities for buyers who are prepared."
The Associated Press contributed to this report.
© 2025 WJHL, Nexstar Broadcasting, Inc. All rights reserved.